Graduating

Whew...well that wasn't so bad. After a year and a half I'm finished with grad school. It wasn't always the experience that I had hoped it to be, but I am still happy and proud to have been able to have this opportunity that few people in life do.

Six months ago a class I took spurred me to start this blog and try to find my birth mom before I graduated in the hopes that she might be able to attend. Sadly, I wasn't able to find her in time. Looking for her has been an incredible experience. I've learned a lot about my mom and dad that I probably wouldn't have known otherwise. I've been able to talk with Don Ambrosio, the lawyer that facilitated the adoption, who still lives in Santiago, Chile and was able to my mom in touch with Don so that she could express her gratitude to him.

I probably don't say it to them enough but I really love my family and I think that this experience has made me realize how lucky I am to have them in my life. I have a hard-working and hilarious father, a strong-willed and caring mother and a wise-beyond-his-years little brother that's going to do great things in life. I don't know what Julia, my birth mother, had planned for me, but what she did was simply the most important event that occurred in my life. Hopefully, I will be able to thank her one day.

Thank you to everyone that offered their prayers and well wishes during this search. Every kind word of encouragement helped keep me going.

It's a big day today and I'm going to live in the moment and savor it.

Letter From Don Ambrosio

I wrote Don Ambrosio this letter a few weeks ago about my birth mom:


Dearest Mr. Ambrosio,

I hope that this letter finds you well. A few weeks ago my friend Vincenzo called you on my behalf because I cannot speak Spanish very well. It was a very hasty call so I will explain my situation again because I think that you can help me.

I was born in February 1, 1986 in Estacion Central, Chile to Julia Veronica Vergara Aravena. She worked as a maid at the time she became pregnant with me. The father asked that she have an abortion but she decided that she would have me and then she would give me up for the adoption. When I was born my name was John Stephano Vergara Vergara.

The name of my adopted mother is Carol Brown. She and my father, Robert, lived in a small town in Texas when they adopted me. My mother said that she spoke with you often during the process of adoption. She thinks that my mother might have stayed with your family in Santiago for the three months that I was there.

I understand that you now are retired and that many of the documents that mention my birth mom could be lost. You are the only person that may have been in contact with my birth mom. I am trying to find her so that she can attend my graduation ceremony this December. I think that it would mean a lot to her and my adoptive family if she could be there.

I cannot express in words how much it would mean to me if you know her or have any documents that could help me find her. Thank you so much Don Ambrosio. I hope to hear from you soon.

Sincerely,
John Stephano Brown

Here is his response:


My Very Dearest John Stephano:
I arranged your adoption, and like many others, it was very sad to see hopeful mothers finding themselves pregnant, and consequently frustrated by their lack of power to give their children what they had desired for them, such as a future and an education. Instead of the alternative of abortion, these women demonstrated true heroism by having their child and putting it up for adoption.

Unfortunately in my country, the desire of these mothers to have their children and give them a better future than that which they could provide was looked down upon. In fact, myself and other lawyers were persecuted for undertaking the generous crusade of helping these mothers, even accused of trafficking minors. This was a very ugly situation, as it assimilates the selling of slaves.

I experienced some very bitter moments throughout this witch hunt, like those in Salem, where honest women homeowners were accused of witchcraft. I was detained as a criminal and all my documentation was seized.
Many years have passed since then, and many since I’ve retired from my professional practice. I’m now 81.

Unfortunately, I do not have a way of locating your heroic mother. All I can do is assure you that she loved you so much that she gave you up so that you would have a better future.

I am truly sorry that I cannot give you the information that you long for, but I embrace you with the warmth of a Chilean that did what he could so that you would have the family that is yours today..

Fondly,
Ambrosio P.

So with a little under a month to go things are kind of at a stand still. I have some ideas of some future steps but we'll have to see if I will be able to put them in motion before graduation. Thanks to Nick, Janine and Vincenzo for helping me translate these letters. As always, thanks to everyone for their kind thoughts and prayers.

Still Waiting on the Don

Still waiting to hear back from Don Ambrosio. Sent the letter to him but haven't heard back yet.

Letter to Don Ambrosio

I wrote a letter to Don Ambrosio, the lawyer who may have known my birth mom. I will send it to him as soon as my friend Vincenzo translates it. Below is the letter and also a pic of myself from kindergarten just for the heck of it. Bonus points to anyone who can name the cartoon character on the shirt I am wearing.



Dear Don Ambrosio,

I hope that this letter finds you well. A few weeks ago my friend Vincenzo called you on my behalf because I cannot speak Spanish very well. It was a very rushed call so I will explain my situation again because I think that you can help me.

I was born in February 1, 1986 in Estacion Central, Chile to Julia Veronica Vergara Aravena. She was working as a maid and at the time she became pregnant with me. The father wanted her to have an abortion but she decided that she would have me and then give me up for adoption. When I was born my name was John Stephano Vergara Vergara.

My adoptive mother’s name is Carol Brown. She and my father, Robert, were living in a small town in Texas when they adopted me. My mother said that she spoke to you often during the adoption proceedings. She thinks that my mother might have stayed with your family in Santiago for the three months that I lived in Santiago.

I understand that you are now retired and that many of the documents that reference my birth mom could be lost. You are the only person that I have been in touch with that spoke to my birth mom. I am trying to find her in the hopes that she can attend my graduation from college. I think it would mean a lot to her and my family if she could be there.

If you know anyone or have any documents that might lead me to her I would be more grateful than you could ever know. Thank you for your time and I hope that you can help me.

Sincerely,
John Stephano Brown

Some Words From My Mom(s)

Just wanted to share two documents from the adoption papers that I have been going through that I found to be pretty special. One is the first letter my mom wrote to "Los Ninos" which is the adoption agency that my parents used to find me. I had totally forgotten was that my dad's mother was adopted. Her story is pretty interesting and hopefully I'll be able to share it with you soon.

I also wanted to share with you the only statements that my birth mother made on record about her reasons for giving me up for adoption. It was nice to find out her full name which is Julia Veronica Vergara Aravena.



In the picture I'm posting you can see my full name as it was written on my passport when I was around three months old. In the next update I'll have the letter I am writing to the attorney who helped my parents adopt me ready to read and send out.

Lots of Reading To Do

Hope everyone had a Happy Fourth of July. I've been going through all the adoption papers that my mom gave me and taking notes. Lots of stuff to read (maybe I picked the wrong time to start reading "Infinite Jest"). I'll be heading home either today or tomorrow to do some filming.